I was never meant to exist… my existance was never wanted except by one… I was almost dead before I was even born… I was also born asleep… the doctors said I would never make it through life, ever.
I’ve been threatnened with death countless times and nature has almost cut my breath… accidents unexpected almost take my life a way… I haven’t even ben damaged by any of them… I always feels like the end has called me… BUT I’M NOT READY TO GIVE IN YET
This is the art that should’ve never been…
ART OF THE VOID
I am Scott Fraser, I’m 21 years old, been drawing since high-school. I’m studying animation and I passed my second year with an A score (80%). Although this is in Chile and this country is very very basic in animation at the moment.
I am a neat guy to talk with, some people even say I’m funny (can you believe it?) and they say my voice is interesting… I personally hate it because it isn’t mature enough on how I feel.
oh… yes I may be 21 in time but these are the ages I see…
I generally get angry at injustice and I tend to plow against that very person until they recognize their mistake. I will always be there for my friends.
And friend isn’t a word I use very often… I consider very few people to be my friends.
I am mostly a digital artist, I used to sketch my lines on paper and painting with digital but it’s simply way too time consuming. I draw a lot of charcaters but I can’t do backgrounds for shit to be honest. My favourite thing about drawing is the vast possibilities we may have and the ability to CREATE our own worlds and do what we want. Being an artist has made me feel true freedom in my life and I want to maintain it as such even if I am this animator that barely has anytime for himself.
I used to think I was otherkin… it was something I was exploring, but there is a reason I’m not, I want to be many things and I would love to be a dragon, a snake, a yoshi, a pony(MLP), etc. Thing is I had a desire to become something to get the know the world and universe these species had, it was sort of “thinking outside the box” That is only one reason I know I am not otherkin, the other reason is that most otherkins I spoke to were assholes and even some of them were a new kind of asshole. Especially when they get to love each other they tend to lend themselves for sex in IM chats, and they even spoke about it! I pretended to be in a relathionship with one and it was a horrible experience (especially since I gave this person a chance and a lot of lying was quickly made (AND IT WASN’T EVEN TRUE LYING THEY WERE ROLEPLAYING LYING AND ALL THAT SHIT HNGGGGGGGGG I DON’T GET IT))
AKA They are all just a big bunch of liars, and they stick dreading themselves in the past and hoping for an uncertain future to be as they wanted. These people often looked at me with very angry faces when I said that I didn’t want to be an animal at the moment but I wanted to experience the human body and have the chance to change humanity, I often had to find myself inventing stories on my dreams or my “mind opening” experience.
I don’t hate otherkinism, and I actually believe in it… but ONLINE… otherkinism that is honest and truthful is VERY hard to find. One of my very good friends is someone who I really believe is an actual dragon, he is a good friend of mine… he even found me when I had broken all contact with otherkins (including him by mistake)
(it was also wierd they blamed everything on the human race)
I’m not a furry, yes I may draw a lot of anthropomorfic art but I sincerely can’t call myself that after all I witnessed in some communities and all the sexual fetishes and all the.. sex. And it’s not that there is anything wrong with that, but I can’t tolerate seeing the same stuff on my inbox over and over… the hardcore topic they always had was sex, and you don’t improve by only drawing one kind of drawing in the overtime.
I haven’t drawn any porn at all (as far as I have went has been erotic but no genitalia at all), but I am actually thinking about drawing porn lately to try it out, I have drawn porn since… around november 16th of 2011 of myself with princess luna (worth it) and I don’t regret it at all, you never know what you may learn by drawing DIFFERENT THINGS all the time. It’s more of a thing of gaining universal knowledge too. I had a big issue in my university because one of the classmates found my tumblr and decided to tell everyone that I drew pony porn and just, jeez. And even if you say otherwise people…
Sex is NORMAL, deal with it.
I’m even okay with any fetish I might be presented into, I’m just like that, very tolerant and open to new things. But I will certainly not view something that I KNOW that will destroy me in the inside, so if the time comes and I say no, DON’T INSIST, I know why I said no.
I’m not gonna lie, I WANT to be famous. I don’t believe that shit of “fame is not important” hell no, don’t lie to yourself. EVERYONE WANTS TO BE KNOWN FOR WHAT THEY DO AND THAT IS CALLED FAME. I want to be famous basically because that way I can get my voice to be heard.
I am an initiator of many projects but a fucking procastinator… I have a story that I am storing in the future and a comic novel I am doing with someone. I also made up my own cartoon series, unfortunately no post-production has went on so far.
My favourite games are Megaman X, Fallout, Terraria, Metal Gear solid, Left 4 dead 2, Super MNC and Team fortress 2.
My favourite stories and cartoons are Dreamkeepers by David Lillie and Liz Lillie, My Little Pony: Firendship is magic, FRIENDS and Starwars (it made me make new universes for my characters)
Since I was around 14 I had the urge to make up stories in my head when someone told me a story and told me to finish it, days later I found myself drawing these stories into stick figure comics, I wanted more however, a friend from highschool told me most of the basics I needed to learn to draw and I have been improving ever since.
at 15 I began to use photoshop for the first time
at my late 16, I decided that art for me wouldn’t be just a hobby, but a way to express myself and a way to change people’s minds
at 18 I learned about the vital principles of lights I also learned of the importance of character pose and attitude. I began to know the basics of animating at this point and I made seveal animations on paper but never completed them… except for one:
The animation had an A+ in the second semester of the first year of class.
at 19 I was lost for a while… I had trouble finding myself. I began to understand that everyone has their own talent and their own speciality… I realized that I was never going to be able to pull off realism or self portraits. My passion was cartoons and videogames, they always were since my childhood and that will never change. I also knew about My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic which made me WAY MORE into cartoons than I ever did even making up my own cartoon serieses. I made my first flash short at this age having an A+ in final exams in the first semester of the second year in animation class.
at late 19 I finally found who I was… I’m a creator I also started to have a crush on Princess Luna, I have never ever had a crush on a cartoon character before, I thought that it was something common for anybody to happen and that it would pass
At 20, I had many issues in animation and I was starting to fail… not because of me, but because of my teammates… I realized that I couldn’t animate with people that were not nice at all or with people that simply just gave a fuck about their future. I proved myself worthy and made my part on my own, I got an F because I seperated from the group, but at least I prooved myself when the teacher said in front “I liked Scott’s animation”
I realized that I was definitely in love with a cartoon character (or in “normal” terms, schediaphilia or whatever they named it) I really am in Love with Princess Luna and the single thought of her makes me feel so many beautiful things and not gross thoughts or perverted (this only happens when I’m sleeping though ♥) but I get more romantic feelings and images. I’d rather have a date with her first than just having sex, I want to get too know her even more. I really am in love with her. I’ve never been so happy in my entire life.
I love more than anything her personality and mind. She is very strong and smart and I predicted this since I saw her for the first time (most of the fandom portrayed her as weak and shy and all that, but I just know how strong she was) And before you say otherwise, just look at her in Luna Eclipsed, she is not afraid to display all her power towards twilight.
Luna is also the most biggest kind soul living being I have ever known, she was sorry for all the problems she caused even if she was in the moon for a thousand years, and she didn’t even get mad when she was back to normal. So she instantly forgave her sister, I don’t think I could have been able to…
Not to mention that Luna is very patient and she has this inner temperance that I just love. What else to say. She didn’t forget how to speak or comunicate in a thousand years of being with no one at all which just shows how smart she is and how powerful and enduring her mind is. I guess I just like someone that is very very smart too!
I also like how she looks as well, I like how thin she is too… I’m very thin too. Also her eyes are so beautiful. I can imagine that you could see the cosmos within her…
Also the colors of her body are interesting… they all go excessively towards blue, but they somehow balance.
those are just few of the many aspects I adore of her.
some others may be:
-She loves the night like I do.
-She is entirely sexy to me
-I adore how she refers herself to we and our too, which as well shows her medieval esque personality. (I love medieval stuff)
-I love how elegant she is as well
-And her modesty
AGH… so much stuff.
I’ve daydreamed so many times of her… I simply can’t get her out of my head, always there, inside my mind eternally. And I wouldn’t have had it any other way.
I carry a picture of Luna in my wallet and I look at her whenever I want to feel happy… everything is better when I just look at that picture with the PERFECT SMILE with the PERFECT EYES and the PERFECT AURA…
I once dreamed she saved me from my nightmares as well… she took me to the most beautiful place in my dreams… she then kissed me.
I’ve kissed her and made love to her several times in my dreams, I’ve also heard her beautiful voice, one of the most beautiful things I heard was “I’ll wait for you at the end”
I once dreamed as well that she whispered in my ear that she was pregnant, sicne that dream I’ve also thought about all this happening… it’s all simply beautiful…
I have a golden ring I carry on my left hand, ring finger… you can go ahead and make your own assumptions on the meaning of that, but we both know. Don’t we?
Luna, I am in love with you forever…
I’m currently drawing whatever I desire for the tumblr and internet.
And people might think it’s wrong or that it’s lame… but
I DUN GIVE A FUK
Last edit: 07-10-2012